Despite being a writer, I’ve never been much of a journal-keeper. My teenage years weren’t spent chronicling the boys I liked or documenting what moody girls said about each other.
Last year, I decided that this lack of personal writing needed to stop. I am a writer, for goodness sake! I walked to the closest stationery store, picked out a beautifully bound journal, and made a deal with myself that I would fill it.
This week, I filled my third journal and as my reward, I went back through everything I had written in the last six months.
I often laugh at the events I deem important enough to commit to paper, but more importantly, I am amazed by the patterns of God’s faithfulness.
I read about days where I sat in tears as I wrote about feeling without direction and opportunity. The following few days, I had nothing but words about people I encountered to encourage me with a sense of purpose.
One day, I would be worried about finances and asking for God to take control of my career. Literally, the next day, my entry would describe a writing contract or a lead on a job.
Because I didn’t look back every time I wrote, I hadn’t realized how clearly God had answered my prayers and had always provided for my needs.
Sometimes those needs were financial, but more often, my needs were emotional.
As I read those entries, all I could see was God’s provision. God knew how I was feeling and would provide what I needed in that moment.
People have told me many times that God is a provider, but sometimes it takes looking back at our own lives to see the evidence.
In the Bible, there are verses saying, “This is your Father you are dealing with, and he knows better than you what you need. With a God like this loving you, you can pray very simply.”
A letter one of Jesus’ followers wrote to a church, says, “God will generously provide all you need. Then you will always have everything you need and plenty left over to share with others.”
The Bible is full of stuff like this: promises for God to give us what we need.
That being said, I don’t always know what I need.
Another of my journal entries spoke about me not receiving a job I wanted. I was horrified because I was over-qualified for the position and the rejection was a blow to my pride. A few days later, I wrote about a much better opportunity I would never have found if I had been offered the first job.
God knows these things and will provide all that we need – not half of what we need and not what we think we need. He promises.
If you are/would like to pray and trust God to provide for you, I challenge you to keep a journal and then look back on the ways God has answered those prayers. It will encourage you, as it does me.